poison28205

I SWEAR I KNOW MY BLOGS THIS WEEK HAS BEEN SO DOWN AND OUT CONSIDORING THAT IM ALWAYS THE HAPPY JOY GO LUCKEY BLOGGER. BUT I HAVE TO BLOG ABOUT THIS SITUATION. OK I LIVE IN AN APARTMENT THIRD FLOOR. I CHOOSE THE THIRD FLOOR FOR THE SIMPLE FACT I HATE NOISE ABOVE ME. SO OK FOR THE PAST 7 MTHS OR SO THIS CHICK BELOW ME GETS ANNOYED AND OFTEN BANGS THINGS TO HER CEILING MEANING I CAN HEAR IT ON MY FLOOR. I GEUSS THAT IS HER WAY OF TELLING ME TO SIT DOWN. OK I HAVE A 2 YEAR OLD SON MANY MOMS ON HERE CAN IDENTIFY WITH A TODDLER OF HIS AGE. HE IS FULL OF ENERGY THIS IS HIS HOUSE SO IF HE WANTS TO SKIP TO HIS ROOM TO GET A TOY HE CAN. SHE HAS A PROBLEM WITH EVERYTHING SHE HEARS. SO TODAY IM CRUSHING PECANS ON MY KITCHEN COUNTER TO PREPARE MY FAMILY DINNER AND LIKE CLOCK WORK HERE COMES THIS BEYONCE WANNABE CHICK BANGIN SO LOUDY IT SCARED MY SON. SHE GOES “IM DOING MY HOMEWORK AND IT IS TOO MUCH NOISE UP HERE,” SO THIS WAS THE LAST DRAW I WENT OFF. I ASKED HER TO PAY HALF OF MY RENT TOLD HER IT WAS ONLY 8 PM AND IM NOT LETTING YOU RUN MY HOUSEHOLD. I HAVE ALWAYS HAD COMMON COURTESY FOR HER AND TELL MY SON TO CONTROL HIS SELF IF HE BEING A LITTLE LOUD, BUT I REFUSE TO TELL MY BABY HE CANT WALK AROUND WHEREVER HE LIKES. BUT OF COURSE THESE ARE THE THINGS THAT SHE DOENT KNOW. SO MORE WORDS WERE EXCHANGED I SLAMMED THE DOOR IN HER FACE AND SHE YELLS OUT “YOU BETTER SHUT THAT DOOR WITH YOUR FAT ASS!!!!!” OK SO ME ALREADY BEING REVED UP I OPENED BACK UP AND ASKED “IT IS OPEN WHAT ARE YOU GONE DO?” OF COURSE ALL SHE LEPT SAYING WAS SHUT UP WITH YOUR FAT A.. AND KEPT REPEATING IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN. MY THING IS THIS; IS THAT ALL SHE CAN COME UP WITH? I HAVE BEEN HEARING THAT IN AN ARGUMENT SINCE I WAS 8 YEARS OLD. SHE SAID IT MAYBE LIKE 15 TIMES BEFORE WALKING BACK DOWNS THE STAIRS. SO I REPLIED I MIGHT BE FAT BUT DAMMIT ARE YOU HEALTHY???

SEE THIS IS THE CERTAIN STUFF I HAVE BEEN BLOGGING ABOUT FOR THE PAST COUPLE OF DAYS, THESE SKINNY CHICKS THAT FEEL BAD ABOUT THEIR SELF AND PUT OTHERS DOWN ONLY TO MAKE THEM FEEL BETTER. HOW CAN YOU BE HAPPY INSIDE BUT CONSTANTLY CALL OUT OTHERS FLAWS; AS IF I DONT ALREADY KNOW IM FAT. BUT DO YOU SAY ANYTHING TO ME WHEN YOU SEE ME COMING FROM THE GYM IN THE MORNINGS? NO YOU JUST LOOK THE OTHER WAY HOPING AND WISHING YOU HAD MY WILL POWER AND AND DETERMINATION TO GO TO THE GYM AND WORKOUT FOR 60 MINUTES. SO CALLING ME FAT IS ONLY MOTIVATION TO DO EVEN MUCH BETTER. SO I CANT WAIT TIL SHE SEES ME NEXT YEAR 100 POUNDS LIGHTER AND HEALTHIER…THANKS FOR LETTING ME VENT.

OK YESTURDAY I POSTED A BLOG ABOUT PEOPLE WHO ARE TRYING TO LOSE VANITY POUNDS AND I RECEIVED ALOT OF HATE MAIL ABOUT IT OF COURSE I WAS FROM ALOT OF WAS FROM OF COURSE YOU GEUSSED IT . THE ONES WHO ARE TRYING TO LOSE VANITY POUNDS. SO I WASNT GOING TO RESPOND TO THEIR EMAIL INSTEAD I WANTED TO MAKE IT PUBLIC SO THAT WAY I WILL KNOW FOR SURE IM HANDLING THIS IN THE CORRECT WAY. OK IF YOU HAVENT READ THE BLOG I POSTED YESTURDAY PLEASE FEEL FREE TO GO AND READ IT BEFORE PROCEEDING HERE. OK MY BLOG WASNT IN NO WAY SHAPE FORM OR FASHION DEGRADING ANYONE, BUT I WANT TO POST A COMMENT THAT I GOT FROM A MEMBER FROM BUDDY SLIM BELOW HERE IS HER RESPONSE TO MY BLOG…

(first of all this website is not for just obese people. Everyone has weight issues here. whether they have 10 pounds to lose or 200 pounds to lose. The reason why us “thinner” girls complain is because we need to keep ourselves in check to prevent obesity. Do not get me wrong, if I where next to one who was “obese” I wouldn’t, so that is completely wrong.. but we have the right to feel and have emotions just as you do. If I screw up and eat a donut one night, yes I will wake up feeling like a cow.. lol.. but that is not only an expression, but my own personal feelings.. and I am entitled just as everyone else is.
Most of us work very hard to maintain our weight and take it off… so if we complain… So what?
good luck to you but you should never take offense, nor let anyone bring you down…If you feel like you are being targeted, then say something… maybe those girls have some serious psychological issues(did u say 110?)… Perhaps saying something to them will help them, and in turn make you feel better… It might also help them realize that they are hurting you….
Wish u all the luck….)

OK I FELT ALOT OF ANGER IN HER WORDS BUT I FELT LIKE SHE WAS TRYING TO BE “kind” BUT IT DIDNT WORK SO IM GOING TO BREAK IT DOWN HERE. YES WE ALL HAVE EMOTIONS, YES WE ALL HAVE STRUGGLES BUT LISTEN CHICK YOU HAVE NEVER BEEN 324 POUNDS BEFORE SO NO OUR STRUGGLES ARENT THE SAME, SORRY OF YOU FEEL LIKE A COW IF YOU EAT A DONUT THAT SOUNDS LIKE INSECURITY TO ME AT LEAST I KNOW IF I EAT A DONUT I CAN CHALK IT UP WRITE IT DOWN AND START A NEW, MAINTAIN AND WEIGHT LOSS ARE TWO DIFFRENT THINGS, SORRY IF I LOSE WEIGHT FASTER THAN YOU CUZ IM HEAVIER NEWS FLASH MAYBE YOU NEED NOT TO LOSE ANYMORE, I HAVE MUCH MORE TO SAY BUT I WONT IM DONE WITH THE SITUATION, BUT DONT YOU EVER PUT YOURSELF IN MY SHOES UNLESS YOU HAVE BEEN WHERE I HAVE BEEN. I WANT TO HEAR FROM PEOPLE THAT HAS BEEN WHERE I HAVE BEEN AND HAVE GOTTEN TO WHERE I WANT TO BE OR WHO IS IN THE PROCESS OF GETTING THERE. NO WE DONT HAVE ANYTHING IN COMMON AND NO YOU DONT KNOW HOW I FEEL. YES YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO SPEAK I NEVER SAID ANYONE CANT VOICE THEIR CONCERNS.

I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN CONSIDORED THE FAT GIRL MOST OF MY LIFE AND I KIND OF GREW USED TO IT AND ACCEPTED IT. BUT NEVER AS A TEENAGER DID NOT SEPERATE FROM THE CLIQUES IN SCHOOLS OR THE QUOTE ON QUOTE SKINNY GIRLS I WAS WELL LIKED. I HAVE ALWAYS LOVED FASHION AND CLOTHES. DESPITE BEING “BOOM BOOM MELINDA” TO ALOT OF MEAN PEOPLE GROWING UP I STAYED LOOKING NICE. I WAS OUTGOING AND STILL IS, BUT A LONG STORY SEMI SHORT I LOVE CLOTHES. I DONT THINK I EVER POSTED MY STORY ON HERE ABOUT THE WAKE UP CALL I HAD FOR ME TO SAY ENOUGH ENOUGH IS I HAVE TO BE SMALLER. BUT ANYWAY I WILL POST IT LATER. TRYING NOT TO BE EXTEMELY PERSONAL MY FIANCE HAS BEEN OUT OF WORK FOR A WHILE DUE TO SURGERY ON HIS KNEE SO ALL FIANCIAL RESPONSIBILTY HAS BEEN ON ME. WHEN I GOT INTO THIS WEIGHT LOSS JOURNEY I FAILED TO PLAN ABOUT CLOTHING ALLOWANCE. (BUMMER) NOW THAT MONEY IS SO TIGHT I CANT AFFORD CLOTHES :-(  I HAVE 1 PAIR OF JEANS THAT FITS AND WHEN I DID GET SOME MONEY TO GO SHOPPING GEUSS WHAT HAPPENED???

I WENT TO ALL MY FAVORITE STORES AND EVEN WENT TO ONES I DONT FREQUENT AND THE CLOTHES JUST DONT FIT RIGHT. THEY WERE EITHER TOO BIG OR TOO SMALL AND EVEYBODY SEEM TO BE SELLING THESE SHIRTS THAT ARE EITHER SLEEVELESS OR THE SHORT SLEEVES ARE SUPER SHOTR FORCING ME TO SHOW ALL THIS UNWANTED FLAB THAT HANGS UNDER MY ARMS.(WHICH IAM TRYING TO TONE BUT ONLY SEEM LIKE I WILL HAVE TO HAVE SURGERY TO GET RID OF IT)  OR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT ARE FOR MY MOMS OR GRANDMAS AGE NO OFFENSE TO ANYONE BUT IM ONLY 27 I WANT TO LOOK IT. SORRY FOR BEING ALL POOPY BUT IT JUST SEEMS THAT I CANT WIN FOR LOSING THIS WEIGHT..

IM JUST SO DISCOURAGED IN SO MANY WAYS.

PLEASE I AM BEGING YOU THIS BLOG ISNT BY ANY MEANS GEARED TOWARD ANYONE I KNOW PERSONALLY AND IF I OFFEND YOU I APLOGIZE BUT IM TIRED OF KEEPING THIS IN. OK IT ALL BEGAN A COUPLE OF WEEKS AGO IN MY AEROBICS CLASS. LETS KEEP IN MIND I AM OBESE I DONT HAVE A FEW VANITY POUNDS TO LOSE  IM NOT LOSING WEIGHT SO I CAN FIT INTO SOME DAMN JEANS FOR MY FRIENDS BIRTHDAY (if you know what i mean) I NEED TO LOSE THIS WEIGHT TO BE HEALTHY i have to lose LEAST 140 POUNDS IN ORDER FOR ME TO BE IN MY HEALTHY BMI RANGE. SO TO HEAR PEOPLE THAT IS 160 UNDER COMPLAINING ABOUT HOW FAT THEY ARE JUST MAKES ME SO DARN SICK. I AM THE ONLY FAT GIRL IN MY GYM CLASS EXCEPT MY WATER AEROBICS CLASS AND IT IS THIS ONE GIRL WHO ALWAYS COMES IN AND BEGS OUR INSTRUCTOR TO WORK US ALL HARD BECAUSE “SHE” ATE A TINY PEICE OF ICE CREAM CAKE, OR SHE LICKED A SICKERS BAR, ATE A PEICE OF PIZZA, BLAH BLAH BLAH WHATEVER THE CASE IM SICK OF HEARING IT FOR THE SIMPLE FACT SHE IS LIKE 110 I HAVENT SEEN THAT SINCE MAYBE 8 YEARS OLD AND I HAVE TO LOSE OVER HER WEIGHT TO BE ACCEPTED IN SOCIETY, AND TO EVEN BE CONSIDORED HEALTHY TO MY DOCTOR. I UNDERSTAND PEOPLE HAVE THEIR OWN REASONS FOR WANTING TO BE FIT BUT DAMN CUT THIS FAT GIRL A BREAK. AT LEAST IM TRYING TO BE SMALLER AND I CAN KEEP UP WITH YOU GUYS IN CLASS. BUT IM TIRED OF HEARING “LIKE OMG JENNIFER LOOK AT MY THIGHS IM A COW!” WHAT???!!!! IS SHE SERIOUS FORGET A COW I FEEL LIKE A WHALE BESIDE HER AND I FEEL INSULTED AND DISCOURAGED WHEN AROUND SKINNY FEMALES WHO LOOK AT ME IN DISGUST. ONCE AGAIN IM SORRY IF I AM STEPPING ON ANYBODYS TOES BUT HEY IM SURE IM NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO FEELS THE SAME. SO IF YOU ARE ON HERE JUST TO LOSE SOME POUNDS TO GET INTO A DRESS ON THANKSGIVING PLEASE GIVE US THE ONES WHO ARE IN THIS FOR THE LONG HAUL A BREAK AND STOP COMPLAINING ABOUT THE ANIMAL CRACKER YOU TOOK A BITE OF. THIS IS SERIOUS STUFF FOR US OBESE PEOPLE SO TRY AND BE GENTLE. THANKS

Work vs. Prison:

Just in case you ever get these two environments mixed up, this should make things a little bit clearer.

 
 

@ PRISON You spend the majority of your time in a 10X10 cell	@ WORK You spend the majority of your time In an 6X6 cubicle/office
@ PRISON You get three meals a day fully paid for	@ WORK You get a break for one meal and You have to pay for it
@ PRISON You get time off for good behavior	@ WORK   You get more work for Good behavior
@ PRISON   The guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you	@ WORK   You must often carry a security card And open all the doors for yourself
@ PRISON You can watch TV and play games	@ WORK   You could get fired for watching TV and playing games
@ PRISON You get your own toilet	@ WORK     You have to share the toilet with Some people who pee on the seat
@ PRISON They allow your family and friends to visit	@ WORK You aren’t even supposed to speak To your family
@ PRISON All expenses are paid by the taxpayers with no work required	@ WORK     You get to pay all your expenses to go To work, and they deduct taxes from Your salary to pay for prisoners
@ PRISON You spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out	@ WORK   You spend most of your time wanting To get out and go inside bars
@ PRISON You must deal with sadistic wardens	@ WORK   They are called managers

OK PEOPLE NOT ONLY ARE WE IN THIS WEIGHT LOSS JOURNEY TOGETHER THIS IS ALSO A MENTAL THING FOR US AS WELL. AND I WOULD LIKE TO DO A LITTLE VENTING TO FEEL A LITTLE BETTER. AS YOU MAY WELL KNOW I HAVE LOST 35 POUNDS AND IN THE PROCESS I HAVE CHANGED SO MUCH MENTALLY AND I HAVE BECOME A STRONGER INDIVIDUAL. OK I HAVE THIS COUSIN THAT I ALSO WORK WITH BIGGEST MISTAKE EVER IN THE WORLD. OK SO BEFORE I GOT PREGNANT HER AND I LOST WEIGHT TOGETHER AND SHE WAS OF COURSE SMALLER THAN ME AND SHE ALWAYS WAS THE ONE GETTING ALL OF THE ATTENTION. OK SO I GOT PREGERS GAINED MY WEIGHT BACK PLUS MORE WHILE SHE WAS STILL ON THE HIGH ROAD TO SMALLVILLE..AND KEPT ON SAYING THINGS LIKE “i will never gain my weight back this that and the third” IM TRYING TO MAKE A LONG STORY SHORT SO OK GUESS WHAT!! SHE HAS GAINED ALL OF IT BACK AND PLUS PLUS PLUS MORE. I MEAN SO MUCH WEIGHT TO WHERE PEOPLE DONT EVEN RECONIZE HER ANYMORE. AND THE MEN THAT USED TO CHASE AFTER HER AND USED TO BASICALLY BEG FOR HER ATTENTION SAW HER THIS PASS SATURDAY COULDNT BELIEVE IT WAS HER AND WE COULDNT CONVINCE THEM OTHER WISE. OK SO OF COURSE I HAVE BEEN LOSING PRETTY FAIRLY AND HAVE COME DOWN A GREAT BIT AND LAST NIGHT WE HIT A WALL. SHE HAS BEEN SAYING LITTLE THINGS TO ME AT WORK BUT I HAVE BEEN IGNORING THEM. BUT LAST NIGHT I FINALLY REALIZED SHE DOSENT CARE FOR ME MUCH ANYMORE. SHE NIT PICKS WITH ME I BELIEVE TO GET A REACTION FROM ME. MY ATTITUDE HAS CHANGED AND I CAN TELL SHE DONT LIKE THAT. BY ATTITUDE I MEAN IM MUCH MORE HAPPIER, I LAUGH MORE, SMILE MORE, AND GET TONS OF COMPLIMENTS AND I DONT LET ANYONE TAKE MY JOY. AND SHE WANTS TO ROB ME OF THAT FEELING. SHE ALMOST HAD ME LAST NIGHT BUT BEFORE I LET HER GET THE BEST OF ME I STOPPED THOUGHT ABOUT IT AND SAID TO MYSELF “melinda is it worth it or should i just seperate myself from her because she is so negative and i dont need that in my life” SO I CAME TO A CONCLUSION COUSIN OR NOT NEGATIVE IS NEGATIVE AND SO I HAVE TO GO ON WITH MY LIFE WITHOUT HER INCLUDED. I FEEL SORT OF BAD BUT I NEED POSITIVE ENERGY AROUND ME. FOR THE PAST MONTH OR SO SHE HAS REALLY BEEN TRYING TO GET ON MY BAD SIDE. SHE IS MISERABLE HER BOYFRIEND IS CHEATING AND POSTING PICTURES OF HER ARPUND THE HOUSE OF HOW SHE USED TO LOOK WHEN THEY MET AND BOUGHT HER A SCALE..IF THAT ISNT A HINT THEN WHAT IS. AND WHILE I MIGHT BE WRONG FOR PUTTING HER INFO ON BLAST LIKE THAT BUT I  HAVE TRIED TO HELP HER LOSE WEIGHT AND GIVING HER POINTERS ON HOW TO DO IT THE HEALTHY WAY AND ALL SHE DOES IS MAKE EXCUSES SO I LEFT IT ALONE. BUT IM SO TIRED I WILL NOT BE MISERABLE WITH HER. SO IM REMOVING MYSLEF AWAY FROM HER!!!!!! THAT IS THAT. SHE HAS BEEN WATCHING ME SHRINK, HEARING PEOPLE CALL ME SKINNY MINNIE, SHE SEE ME IN THE LUNCH ROOM EATING HEALTHIER AND SHE IS JEALOUS. THAT IS MY COUSIN AND IF IT WERE HER I WOULD BE HER BIGGEST CHEERLEADER NOT PUTTING HER DOWN OR MAKING HER FEEL LIKE I WAS UNSUPPORTINVE. SO I WOULD LOVE SOME FEED BACK EVEN THOUGH YOU GUYS DONT KNOW EVERY DETAIL THIS IS ABOUT HOW IT GOES SO WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK???